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Delia Vs. The Women of Cabrera:

Delia's Way:
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice-cream drips.

The Real Woman's Way:
Just suck the ice-cream out of the bottom of the cone. You are probably lying on the sunbed with your feet up eating it anyway.

Delia's Way:
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

The Real Woman's Way:
Buy frozen chips.

Delia's Way:
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking tin, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

The Real Woman's Way:
SuperTurre sells cakes. They even do decorated versions.

Delia's Way:
If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a potato slice.

The Real Woman's Way:
If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that's tough. Please recite with me the Real Woman's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes".

Delia's Way:
Wrap celery in aluminium foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.

The Real Woman's Way:
It could keep forever. Who eats the stuff?

Delia's Way:
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

The Real Woman's Way:
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and drop it in 8 ounces of vodka. Drink the vodka. You might still have the headache, but you won't care!

Finally the most important tip of all ..............

Delia's Way:
Freeze leftover wine into ice cubes for future use in casseroles.

The Real Woman's Way:
Leftover wine?????????? Helllloooo!!!!!!!

And to whoever said "Who's Delia?", congratulations! Treat yourself to another glass of wine. Or vodka.
Written Jokes
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